“Education is one thing that no one can take away from you”

A couple months ago I wrote a post about my dad’s glorious sayings…the ones he repeats to himself (self-talk!) as well as to his children, his wife, the secretary at the church, the grocery store clerk, the lady he meets in the parking lot, the Girl Scout who knocks on his door selling cookies, his neighbor, etc.  You get the point.  He says them all the time – to just about everyone!

“Education is one thing that no one can take away from you,” is one of his mantras, and the one that likely prompted him to take a second mortgage on his home in order to pay for my sister’s Yale education and then four years later for my Northwestern ventures. “Someone can take away your car, your wallet, even your sibling,” he says, “but no one can take away your education.”

So true.

But does “education” have to cost so much money?

Below is my preliminary list of educational experiences that do not cost a dime – or at least don’t demand that you to dip into your savings account in order to nurture your child’s curious mind and need for social connection and belonging.

1. Talk. Yes, talk is cheap. When a parent converses with a child, he or she is framing the ways for a child to see the world…wonder about it, engage in it, respond to it.  We often think that the content of what we talk about with our kids is important (and it is) – but equally as important is how we talk to our kids.  We can nurture their curiosity, offer them an identity as “a learner,” provide them with information, etc…through conversation.
2. Visit the library….the oft-forgotten resource in just about every town in America.  Make friends with the children’s librarian!  They’re a wealth of knowledge.  I love talking to them about books, and they ask kids great questions about what they like, can do, etc.  It’s really fun to watch a good children’s librarian scout out new books with a kid.
3. Play in the park. Pretend to be pirates on a ship.  Dress up as superheroes on a mission to save the world.  You catch my drift – PLAY!  Hands down, play helps children (and adults) develop critical cognitive and emotional competences that not only nurture a child’s spirit, but helps them sort through complex data in envisioning new possibilities.  Make-believe type play, especially, is an exciting time when kids and teens talk to themselves.  Self-talk often knows no boundaries…it can carry over into other aspects of a child’s life.  When pretending to make chocolate oatmeal for me in the bathtub two-year old Siena, for example, needs to figure out what she is going to do next, and how she is going to do it – especially if she wants to get my attention and taste her concoction.  This is a similar cognitive processing a scientist goes through when planning out a research design, or a CEO goes through when strategizing next steps with his or her Board of Directors.  What next, and how to do it….and whether she thinks she is capable of succeeding at it.
4. Go for a drive.  Okay yes, you have to pay for gas, but you can use that to your child’s educational advantage.  She can calculate how much money the family car is getting per mile, how much it will cost to make it to Grandma’s house, etc.  One of my favorite stories about an impromptu “educational drive” comes from my college roommate Kelly who grew up in rain-soaked Seattle.  She didn’t believe that her home state could actually have a desert in it (the other side of the Cascade mountains).  Her dad opened the passenger door, buckled Kelly into the Station Wagon, and started driving.
5. Practice. Whatever it is your child is on the way to mastering – a safe roll on the soccer field, a dramatic hit on the hockey rink, a new line in a play, a solo in the school band’s upcoming concert – he or she must practice if she’s going to get any better.  No matter how brilliant our children, at some time in their educational journey they are going to run into challenges in school – something that they can’t do or “get” at first exposure to it.  If she’s in the habit of practicing to get better at something, then she’s well on her way to a life of educational success.

Killer TV’s Are On The Loose

Killer TV’s Are On The Loose

Yes, you read that correctly.  It sounds like something from a bad 1950′s Science Fiction Movie, but it’s real:  TV’s are literally killing children all over America.

I happened across this mind-boggling article this morning.  Here’s an excerpt:

“A team from the Center for Injury Research and Policy at Nationwide Children’s Hospital in Ohio reviewed data from 100 emergency rooms and estimated that about 14,700 furniture-related injuries occurred each year between 1990 and 2007 – almost half due to TV sets, the most common article involved in the accidents – and resulted in about 300 deaths.”

As it turns out, TV sets are falling on, or more accurately being pulled over on top of, children and crushing them to death.  The article goes on to say that securing TV sets, like you would with the newest flat-screens, may go a long way to preventing injury and death.

That’s good news….

…but it got me to thinking today about other, more insidious ways that TV’s are doing much greater harm to our children besides crushing them.

It bring up the question, “what does it cost you (and your children) to own your TV?”

Now you might respond with, “anywhere from a couple hundred to a few thousands of dollars, depending on the model, plus your monthly fee for cable.”

You’d be wrong.

That’s what it cost to BUY your TV.  Here’s what it costs to OWN it.

The average child in America watches between 4 and 8 hours OF TV A DAY?! That’s such an outrageous number that is seems impossible…but we know it’s true.  Think of it this way–most children have a “part-time to full-time job to watch TV.”

That’s 4-8 hours–each and every day–being bombarded with “mind-numbing” messages, including a constant barrage of junk-food ads.  I won’t even get into the questionable moral situations and violence.

You may not believe that people, and children, are directly and indirectly influenced by what they see day in and day out on TV….but if you’re a parent, you will undoubtedly agree that CHILDREN LEARN BY WATCHING.  So what are they watching?

More so than the brain damage hour after hour of “mental junk-food” TV provides, I’d like to address The Hidden Costs Of TV–what is sapping the Life-Force from our children–”Zombifying them”–so that it’s almost like killing them.

The Hidden Cost of 4-8 hours of TV is more than the inane programming…it’s what children are NOT doing because they are plopped in front of the Idiot Box.

With 4-8 hours in front of a TV your child is NOT:

• Engaging in unstructured, IMAGINATIVE PLAY
• Getting 30-60 minutes of Physical Exercise
• Developing Social Skills while interacting with other children
• Drawing, painting, playing music–CREATING
• Learning New Skills, exercising his or her Brain
• Reading or Writing or Studying
• Working toward and Achieving ANY worthwhile Goal
• Creating “Flow”–Optimal Experience

And that’s just A FEW of the Hidden Costs of TV.  Whew!

So here are 5 Simple Steps to Keep TV From Killing Your Kids:

1)  Secure it. Make sure it doesn’t fall on your child.

2)  Hide it. Put it in an armoir or behind a curtain, so it’s like watching a movie.  Hiding it will help keep it “out of sight, out of mind.”

3) Limit it. Place strict limits on its use.  Make it a reward AFTER doing any of the activities on the above list, or other activities that you value and require.  (Do the same for their internet use)  You can limit TV to weekends-only, or have “no TV” days.  Sunday is a popular no TV day.

4)  Replace it. Replace the “electronic babysitter” with a real, live babysitter.  Or at least find a way for others to spend time with your child.  Remember, “it takes a village”, so find and connect with “a village.”

5)  Record it. Use Tivo or a DVR to record only what you deem watchable beforehand.  You can skip the commercials (or mute them) and only watch what you value.

So, Think Outside of the (idiot) Box and Keep Your Child’s Brain Alive and Well.